I’m Going Slightly Mad

I'm one card short of a full deck
I'm not quite the shilling
One wave short of a shipwreck
I'm not my usual top billing
I'm coming down with a fever
I'm really out to sea
This kettle is boiling over
I think I'm a banana tree

I did not think it was possible for me to get stir crazy but I am afraid it has started to happen. At the halfway mark of my absence from work, I have begun to go mad. Do not go jumping to conclusions (Yes, yes, it's horrible…this idea….) I do not miss work at all, especially with the occasional reminders Stinky T leaves on her blog about the wonderful office atmosphere and the various characters the company employs. In fact quite the opposite, I am starting to dread the day I have to return to work.

There is roughly two months until that dreadful day but the inevitable doom is starting to creep into my mind like the approaching storm clouds outside. This feeling was first realized Saturday when I had to meet my wife in Oakville en route to Buffalo for a lacrosse game. You see, my wife was working in the morning so I decided it would be a good idea to meet somewhere west of Toronto and instead of driving somewhere to meet her I decided to take the GO train. Two months of not having to use the train is all it took for me to forget the pains of public transportation. Let me just say I have more fun going to the dentist. It was after (I guess at some point during) the train ride that I came to the sad realization that in eight short weeks I will be taking the train twice every day to travel to and from work. The seed of dread planted itself in my mind and is now starting to grow.

I have really enjoyed my first two months away from work and have found enough to keep me occupied but recently there seems to be more time for me to do nothing. My routine changed somewhat and Alan is sleeping longer when he actually falls asleep so as a result, I have more free time. I guess this free time is also a result of my getting into a rhythm with the baby and the housework thereby reducing my wasted time. A couple days ago, I found my PS2 under a thick coat of dust and even though it was mistreated and ignored for several months, after a little dusting, the PS2 forgot its mistreatment and started without a hitch. I may have found something to occupy my free time and I hope it does not object to the abuse it will soon be suffering. The next two months may not be so boring after all. Six weeks from now I will likely be complaining that we time at home is almost up. Until then, I shall make the best of things here.

I'm knitting with only one needle
Unraveling fast its true
I'm driving only three wheels these days
But my dear how about you
I'm going slightly mad
I'm going slightly mad
It finally happened
It finally happened - oh yes
It finally happened
I'm slightly mad
Just very slightly mad
And there you have it

* Highlighted paragraphs are lyrics from Queen’s ‘I’m Going Slightly Mad’